Ramblings...

This has been a very interesting year indeed despite only 2 months passed. I'm sure with the turning of time it will get more and more exciting with all sorts of activities planned to bring great things my way, Insya Allah. Whatever the hurdle, whatever the need, I will definitely put my best into everything I do. Like I always say, what doesn't kill you makes you stronger.

Recently, I broke up with a guy (well not really that recent) and after settling for just friends, well lets say he had a taste of my unfiltered wrath and so we perhaps are not friends anymore. Perhaps its for the better. There was a certain attraction to the idiot (yes I am still mad at him but he's forgiven) but after scolding the poor lad, I felt unsettled. Perhaps I went a little bit too far. So I decided to apologize the the guy, not because he was right, but because I think my words were too harsh and I do realize that I have a tendency to hit certain sensitive spots with my words. Despite preferring to apologize face to face, Malay men hate confrontations, so I'll just have to make do by sending a text message instead.

After all of this transpired, I start asking myself whether do I really need a man to begin with? Well maybe at some point of time, later on when I am less busy as I am. But he has to be someone who is really interested to know who I am, not like most of the guys I meet nowadays are actually more interested with the outside appearance. What happens if my boobs start to sag? Would you still love me then?

I realize I am a highly complicated woman who requires a certain level of respect and understanding from the male counterpart. I can be an extremely romantic lover but it will only surface if I feel that the guy is worthy of my attention and hard work. Yes, I have mood swings, every woman does, but despite all that I do believe that if a guy is really interested in me, and invests time to understand me, it would be one of the best investments of his life.

For the time being, being single is so much fun. I get to do a lot of the stuff that I missed out earlier on. Yeah, maybe I do crave human touch and affection, but as long as God is my number one boyfriend, I doubt he'd let any guy with wrong intentions near me. So far, that is how its been - yeah, one day he'll give me the most suitable partner. I just have to be patient and wait. Amen.